How To Connect To Your Emotions To Be Happier

Have you ever stopped to reflect on the essential role emotions play in our lives? Learn to connect to your emotions effectively to have a happier and fuller life.

Your emotions play a crucial role in your life as they mobilize you to action, provide you with valuable information, and allow you to act more assertively.

When you don’t know how to identify, understand and regulate your emotions, some aspects of your life will inevitably be affected.

For instance, you may experience issues in your interpersonal relationships or will be unable to make the best decisions for your life. You are also at risk of psychosomatic conditions and strong fluctuations in your mood.

Therefore, learning how to connect to your emotions and healthily express them is an essential skill.

Emotional Awareness

Being aware of your emotions means that you can recognize your moods to better relate to yourself.

In the same way, you can recognize the moods of others to better relate to them and develop the ability to capture the emotional climate in a given context.

Some benefits of high emotional awareness are healthier relationships, less conflict and stress at work, and a more satisfying life overall.

But what exactly are emotions?

An emotion is an automatic and unconscious physiological reaction to certain stimuli in our environment.

For example, you get to your job, and your boss informs you they have fired you. In this situation, you can experience several consecutive emotions.

First, you may experience surprise; then, you can feel anger and sadness.

Of course, not everyone reacts the same to similar experiences.

Two people can live the same situation, respond, and FEEL differently because this will depend a lot on their scale of values, personality traits, life background, etc. 

Again: Emotions are automatic reactions to transient impulses that take you out of your normal state and push you into action.

Emotions differ from feelings in that they are more intense and last less time. You can compare them with energy that runs through your body, and that energy can stagnate if you repress it.

Why should you worry about increasing your Emotional Awareness?

Because doing this, you learn to know yourself better and have more control over the way you react to the events that happen to you.

When you develop your Emotional Awareness, you run a lower risk of suffering anxiety and depression.

Emotional awareness will do you much good to reflect on your emotions and learn to channel them in your favor.

Connecting to your emotions will help you be more competent in social, academic, labor, and relationships.

When you learn how to manage and connect to your emotions, you can make better decisions on a day-to-day basis.

But, like everything in life, Emotional Awareness requires learning and practice. 

How to connect to your emotions?

Why do you think so many people have trouble regulating their emotions?

Society has instilled in us the idea that we always have to be in control of our emotions or even repress them. “Emotional crises” or meltdowns are very frowned upon.

So many people misbelieve they cannot trust in their emotions, and that logic and rationality must always prevail.

However, the answer does not lie in rationalizing your emotions. Instead, try to feel your emotions to connect with them.

Learn to identify what you are feeling

Knowing how to identify and name what you are feeling can help you respond better to the events that happen to you.

Emotions and feelings are often complicated, and it can be challenging for some people to identify them.

Some signs may indicate something is bothering you, and you are not yet fully aware.

For example, you are depressed, without energy, demotivated, or anxious.

You are having trouble sleeping, difficulties concentrating on a task, or overeating. Suppressed feelings lead to anxiety and depression.

When you suppress your emotions and feelings for a long time, they are expressed in your body as symptoms.

Some symptoms are headaches, ulcers, high blood pressure, asthma, or heart problems, among others, known as psychosomatic symptoms.

You must learn to identify those repressed feelings; in this way, it will be easier to reduce them.

Ask yourself the following questions:

Do I spend much time on activities like watching TV or shopping to look for instant gratification and postpone uncomfortable situations?

Do I feel tension or discomfort in any part of my body?

You must take a moment to relax, close your eyes if that helps you and dedicate yourself to feeling.

On the other hand, it is convenient to make a subjective evaluation of your feelings and emotions, starting with the most basic emotions, to reach the most complex.

How can you identify what you feel to connect with your emotions? First, stop and ask yourself: How do I feel right now?

Make a check of your body and physically locate the emotion: In what part of my body is this sadness expressing itself?

Give a name to the emotions and feelings present. Accept everything you feel without judging yourself. Find out what led you to feel that way. 

How do you express emotions healthily?

Once you have already identified and named the emotions, it is time to give them a way out.

Here is a list of recommended activities to express your emotions and feelings adequately.

Find someone you trust with whom you can talk

Having a friend or family member with whom you can talk freely about your feelings is always comforting and will do you much good. 

Human beings have the innate need to communicate with their fellow. Do not dismiss that need.

Express yourself in writing

Are you a person with just a few friends and have trouble talking openly about yourself? 

It is still possible to express yourself in writing; sometimes, this activity can be even more therapeutic for certain people.

Let your tears flow

Crying helps released sadness. Do not shy yourself if you feel you want to cry. 

Sadness is another part of life; it is essential to express it. Sometimes it helps to watch a sad movie or get carried away by some memory that makes you sensitive.

Plaster it in a painting

Find a canvas and some brushes, and express yourself through the strokes and colors. 

Draw the way you want, press as hard as you need, and pay attention to the emotions you feel.

Create a soundtrack

It is a fact that music has a powerful, liberating effect on emotions. 

Some kinds of music, like Bach’s pieces, can generate intense emotions even when we can’t determine what kind of emotions they are.

Experts recommend creating a playlist with songs that evoke the emotions you want to explore.

Listen to your soundtrack whenever you need it, close your eyes, and let the emotions flow without repressing them. 

Music is a great resource to connect to your emotions and be happier.

Make a collage

Express yourself through pictures. 

Cut out photographs of magazines that generate some emotion. 

Then paste them into a collage and carefully observe the result of your work.

What do the images convey to you? What is the message you can extract?

Sometimes it is easier to understand messages through images than words. Illustrations directly appeal the emotion and facilitate expression.

Are negative emotions wrong?

It is normal wanting to run away from everything that causes you physical and mental dislike.

That includes negative emotions such as fear, anxiety, anger, and sadness.

As I write this, the image of Snow White comes to mind from the famous animated Disney movie, when she was running away from all the ghosts and scary shapes that hid in the forest.

You can sometimes feel this way, trying to avoid all the emotions that cause you anxiety or pain.

But it is interesting to note that precisely those negative emotions motivate us to act upon some adverse situation we could be facing.

There is increasing evidence that fear, sadness, anger, and other emotions that people avoid are as important as joy to be happy.

If you’re like me, I’m sure you hate feeling sad. However, did you know that sadness is essential to overcome the loss?

Connecting with the sadness

When we are sad, our brain produces a feeling of fatigue and makes us want to avoid activities or meet with other people.

The purpose of this fatigue is to give us the necessary time to assess and accept what we have lost, review its consequences, and above all, find a way to start over.

Connecting with guilt

Another example, in this case, with the feeling of guilt.

 Usually, people with guilt are much more motivated to improve their behavior (unless they are sociopaths, of course).

Some people may feel so affected by guilt that they look for ways to take responsibility for their actions.

Guilt can make you feel pain when you hurt another person, leading you to focus on repairing the damage.

Negative emotions are beneficial because they can help you build an improved version of yourself through the challenges and discomfort.

Connecting and accepting your negative emotions is the first step in understanding what happens to you and, in that way, being able to find the solutions you need so much.

“The truth is that, probably, our best moments come from feeling deeply uncomfortable, sad, or dissatisfied. Because only in those moments, driven by our discomfort, are we likely to get out of our routine and start looking for different paths or accurate answers.”

M. Scott Peck (American psychiatrist and writer).

 

Learn to listen to your body

Do you know how to listen to your body’s signals, or are you disconnected from it to the point that you don’t know how to perceive its messages?

Attention to your body is another effective way to help you discover and connect with your emotions.

Body and emotions go hand in hand. When one speaks, the other reacts.

Some scientific investigations have shown how similar brain areas are activated when we experience physical and emotional pain.

The body is a map that helps us know what we are feeling.

Has it ever happened to you that you have noticed a stomachache, feeling anxious because you were going to face a challenging job interview?

Emotions scream when you don’t listen to them and transform into pain and physical suffering.

What message does your body have to convey to you?

Pay attention to symptoms such as headache, shortness of breath, feeling overwhelmed, and stomach knot.

Although you can suppress emotions, physical sensations are still there. 

The less you pay attention to them, the worse because they express themselves with higher intensity.

Let’s review three basic emotions and some physical symptoms they can generate.

Fear

 This emotion can alert you to potential dangers and helps you prepare to face possible threats.

On a physical level, fear expresses stomach pain, body tension, racing heart, sweating, chest pressure, diarrhea, appetite changes, and insomnia, among others.

These symptoms are not exclusive to fear, but they may be present in some situations in which you feel fear.

When you connect with the emotion of fear, it is best to deal with it assertively.

For example, suppose you attend a challenging meeting. In that case, you can practice breathing and relaxation techniques that help you manage your fear.

Anger

When someone has committed an injustice against you, you indeed feel the need to take action and defend yourself, fighting tooth and nail.

You may experience some physical symptoms such as shortness of breathing, jaw tension, body temperature rise, headaches, etc.

If you usually repress your anger because you think it is the right thing, you will probably live in a state of frustration and a bad mood.

It is best to learn to assertively manage this emotion for your good and the health of your relationships.

For example, if your partner has been unfair to you, instead of starting an argument when you feel angrier, it is best to wait to be calm to explain how you feel.

Joy

This emotion is what helps you to be able to enjoy and feel pleased with the fortunate events of your life.

Joy also helps you establish links, socialize, and share with others. The physical symptoms of fun are easily recognizable: facial smile, chest expansion, laughter, body opening, etc.

Incredible as it may seem, some people have difficulty feeling this pleasant emotion and cannot recognize it when they experience it.

Permitting yourself to enjoy the pleasures of life is also good for your physical health and psychological well-being.

For example, you can enjoy a meeting with friends, even when facing other life challenges, or rejoice with your favorite songs.

Be kind to yourself

When you do the exercise of connecting with your emotions, you may feel a little vulnerable.

It is normal, and it is because in this act of raw honesty with yourself, feelings and thoughts that connect you with your vulnerability can emerge.

This process is essential to reevaluate and take measures that take you to the place you want in your life.

But you don’t need to immerse yourself in guilt or sorrow. 

Do activities that raise your mood and encourage the excitement of joy. The benefits of a positive attitude will reflect in all aspects of our lives.

These are some of my favorite activities to lift my spirit. Some of these activities are ideal for connecting to your emotions and creating a mood that makes you feel joyful.

Move your body

Go for a little walk in the park, dance, swim, and practice any physical activity you have fun with or relax. 

Exercise decreases stress hormones and reduces depression and anxiety.

Meditate

Meditation activity will help you develop mindfulness and better manage your emotions. 

Yoga and meditation are my lifesavers when I feel anxious or negative thoughts lurk. 

Meditation also puts you in the ideal state to connect with your emotions and be a happier person.

Forgives

Do not remain stuck in hatred and resentment towards another person, no matter how much damage you think they have done to you. 

The only one affected will be you. By forgiving, you get rid of negative emotions and move on.

Help the others

Do you want to give your life true meaning and purpose? 

Try to do something for the benefit of others. All the good you do to others will be returned to you multiplied by two, and your mood will benefit greatly.

Acquire new skills

Each new day is a blank page to acquire new skills that make you feel more competent, happy, and fulfilled.

Everything counts to making you feel satisfaction and personal fulfillment, from learning to cook healthy food to mastering that yoga pose.

Seek contact with nature

One activity that helps me relax and feel peace is hands down being in touch with nature. 

I love walking and hiking. Nature walks help me connect better with my emotions and feel happier.

I cannot begin to explain the feeling of fullness and happiness I feel when observing the majestic mountains and breathing the fresh air of nature.

I can assure you that just walking through nature will significantly improve your mood.

Don’t forget to be optimistic

I don’t mean you have to have exaggerated expectations about your life. 

It does not work like that. You can be a down-to-earth person but, at the same time, face difficult situations positively and creatively.

My definition of an optimistic person is someone who can see the rainbow even when in the middle of the fiercest storm.

These activities have in common that they help you regulate your emotions and find moments to disconnect.

Do you want to improve your quality of life, enjoy good mental hygiene, and be happier? Once again. Do not underestimate the importance of your emotions. 

Find special moments to connect with them and consciously take care of your state of mind by practicing activities that feed your vibe positively. 

After all, dedicating yourself to being happy should be the number one priority of your life.

What are your favorite activities to connect with your emotions?